Professor Chastity

One of the things I would like to accomplish not just with this blog but just in life in general is making kink normal. I’ve realized lately that this has become more important to me the older I get and the more involved I get with the kink community.

This has kind of grown from my desire to teach people about chastity and orgasm denial. There is a sex toy store not far from where I live that offers classes and workshops occasionally on various topics surrounding sexuality, things like how to deal with jealousy in a poly relationship, D/s 101, how to use whips, canes, and floggers, etc. I’ve never seen a class about chastity and orgasm denial and I wonder if I would be able to teach such as class.

This led me to consider just what credentials I have that would make anyone possibly interested in what I have to say since the only thing I have to draw on are my own experiences and observations. The people teaching these kinds of classes and workshops are usually sex educators either by virtue of being ‘well-known in the community’ and having taught classes before, or they have some academic background in psychology, therapy, sexology, or even just being a sales associate at the store. In any case the classes are almost always primarily informed by the educators’ personal experiences, so it would seem ‘anyone can do it.’ The trouble is that the reason why they can and I can is that I don’t have any initials after my name or some kind of formal background in sex education, even as tenuous as ‘educating’ customers at the store.

I’ve always just assumed that my ‘way in’ would have to be the route of becoming ‘well-known in the community’ since I don’t have a degree or certification on the topic and I’m not going to quit my job to go work retail. That’s would take a long time and a lot of energy and require me to actually be a part of the community, and for someone with mild social anxiety that’s a little discouraging.

The thought won’t go away, though. Becoming an educator is something I truly feel drawn to. I want to teach people the differences between kink, fetish, and BDSM, how they are similar and how they intersect, the difference between sexual identity and sexual activity, how to explore and understand their sexuality and communicate with their partner(s) about sex, and of course about my own personal kink of chastity and orgasm denial.

I’ve even considered the idea of writing a book one day and I think that’s something I’d like to work towards. So I wonder where to begin. I think maybe I need to go about educating myself on how to become a sex educator.

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